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Hey, I'm Patrick. I'm a queer cis-male from Chicago. I like films (especially horror), music, wrestling and video games. You know, a very interesting person.

I'm going to be on an episode of Genre Grinder about 1981 slasher movies at the end of July, so expect a lot of posts about Canadian tax shelter flicks in the meantime.

Sorry Joan Jett, The Flirts gave explicit instructions not to put another dime in the jukebox and their song is better:

I think I Love Rock n Roll is a bad song but that guitar sound is fucking insane, Joan Jett had the best fucking guitar tones, big-ass glam rock bone-crunchers, have you ever heard Do You Wanna Touch Me?

(Like 99% of slasher movies, any non-converted film viewers will look at it as so-good-it's-bad, at best)

There is a pretty good looking version of Madman on Amazon Prime and I would reccomend it to any head who wants a Troll 2 tone in a competently directed film.

My favorite discovery in jumping back into the slasher movies of 1981 is Madman, an absolutely adorable campfire tale slasher that is entirely populated by kind supportive people who like each other, to the point where the whole thing feels ridiculously afraid of conflict. It's a really pleasant experience, especially in the context of all these dum-dums getting murdered in gruesome ways.

Strange Behavior is a one of a kind beauty of a sci-fi slasher, a truly original mix of camp and earnest character work. Filmed in Australia but set in Central Illinois, which means they were 9,800 miles from the nearest Steak n Shake and had to build one for the movie. Beauty.

Check out this Halloween party scene complete with choreographed dance number to "Lightnin' Strikes":

Halloween 2 has a sight gag where a little boy at the hospital is bleeding profusely out his mouth, a reference to the old razor blade in the apple urban legend. Which means, in addition to Michael Myers, Haddonfield has a maniac who is handing out sabotaged apples to little trick-or-treaters.

Sword of Trust is a really really fun comedy and Marc Maron is excellent in it. Very old school 90s no-budget indie vibes.

Pizzeria websites that claim a 12" pizza feeds two? That's violence.

The good thing about being a horror fan is again and again you will see films that are undeniably powerful but challenge traditional concepts of artistic achievement, if you can look past what is considered "poor production value" you can move understandings of art that are defined by wealth and capitalism, you can begin to appreciate truly revolutionary aesthetic values and also boy oh boy this blood gushes nicer than blood has gushed in any movie before, hella sick, that shit is DOPE.

I am hear to preach the good word of House by the Cemetery, a genuinely great movie that you may think is a genuinely awful movie if you don't have your third eye open.

smut, not actually lewd 

The Art of Self-Defense is pretty funny, which is good because it majorly chickens out in tackling incels and red pills and all that in any serious way.

I just did a survey of the rest of the year in film and while 2018 was a historically bad year for movies I think I can say with confidence this one is gonna be worse.

Now that that bubble's been popped, my take is: Tom Hooper is a terrible director and pairing him with terrible properties is a mercy on everyone. To my memory Cats doesn't have a trans character for him to cast with Eddie Redmayne, so we're already taking a step in the right direction.

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film take, somewhat related to the Cats trailer 

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I am fully terrified to watch the Cats trailer, y'all.

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Cats looks weird as hell and is probably a total mess so I on board with it 100%

There isn't a ska cover of New Slang on YouTube, how the hell is my elementary school nostalgia supposed to meet my high school nostalgia now?

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