inspired by Thomas's newfound disregard of nuance, I will henceforth only review movies using traffic light colours
Mad Max: Fury Road 🟢
Apple in the River 🟡
Trancers 🟢
Antonio Gaudí 🟡
Tokyo Drifter 🟢
red movies are for chumps
critic/filmmaker Dan Sallitt has a baroque six-colour scale he uses instead of ratings place movies in an all-time context
the colors are red (pantheon), orange (near-masterpiece), yellow (Hall of Very Good), blue (good), purple (lowest rung of recommendability or interest), and everything not worth ranking is grey
for all it's flaws this is better than Mike D'Angelo's 100-point scale
if you grade art on a 100-point scale you are diseased
@derek how could you possibly rate to 100 holy shit
@Thomas It makes my brain cramp up
@derek How does he score it? What's the difference between an 89 and a 90???
@Thomas one point, apparently
@derek 1 bonus point for uuuuhhh... clearly written credits
@Thomas it's madness
@tessaracked @Thomas I'm gonna have a fucking aneurysm
@derek @tessaracked -1, took the lord's name in vain
@derek @tessaracked -1, saw this once as a kid
@douglasfur @Thomas I see this on Letterboxd, like "Acting: 20/25, Aesthetics: 17/25 [...]" and I stroke out every time
@derek @douglasfur HOW is just shaking me
@Thomas @derek @douglasfur Electronic Gaming Monthly enters the world of cinema
@alex @derek @douglasfur I think even rating parts of a movie separate from others because film is collaborative. How can you rate acting separate from direction? How can you rate cinematography separate from set design or even wardrobe?
@Thomas @derek @douglasfur simple.
you just listen to the score and assign that a number
you then listen to the movie with the screen off and assign that a number
you then watch the movie with no sound and put a thumb up to the screen whenever an actor is present and assign that a score
then you watch the movie through a peephole and only look at the actors' faces and assign th
@alex @Thomas @derek @douglasfur robert parker's leonard maltin's movie guide
@derek @douglasfur @Thomas i love that they think acting and aesthetics make up for a total of 50% of a movies worth. Like you can determine that a movies aesthetic can only ever be worth up to 25%, but something like real world impact isn't even counted
@derek this is too much nuance!
also pick better colours bro, my colourblind ass can't differentiate a bunch of this