Friendly, joking, we-all-know-we’re-kidding style “light” bullying sucks. Sorry. It’s a shitty way to interact with friends. It’s hurting someone in the group more than you or they know.
I got a lot of that from my friends in high school, and I swore up and down I didn’t mind, but it fucked me up. It taught me that to be close to people I had to accept mistreatment and I am only really figuring out just how much that got in my head now that I’m almost 40.
Be nice to each other. Nice is good.
@bulkington I don't know why our generation thought that was a valid way to interact with our friends.
@sabogato I think snarky sitcom and kid show writing have something to do with it. We are socialized by that stuff.
@bulkington god I'm glad I'm not the only one who hates this shit. there's enough mockery and shame in the world. why put more of it on the people you say you love.
@bulkington i mean personally, i sometimes like this
But it has to be in specific relationship with a solid foundation
For me its a reminder of that foundation. Because i know that they like me and vice versa. Even with the things they might be joking about.
That joking kinda exchange serves as a reminder that the foundation is strong
But if the foundation starts to crack in any way, its bad and those jokes start to hurt. Because i no longer trust that they aren't being serious
(Idk if were talking about the same dynamic, you might be talking about something different. Also this is very much not universal and is something you have to figure out and navigate in relationships)
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